1. Georg Simmel, The Sociology of Georg Simmel, ed. Kurt H. Wolff (New York: Free Press, 1950), 325.

2. Ralph Linton, cited by Cora DuBois, "The Gratuitous Act: An Introduction to the Comparative Study of Friendship Patterns," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 30; Gerald D. Suttles, "Friendship as a Social Institution," in Social Relationships, ed. George McCall et al. (Chicago: Aldine Publishing, 1970), 96-98.

3. Robert Paine, "In Search of Friendship: An Exploratory Analysis in Middle-Class Culture," Man 4 (1969): 514.

4. Ibid.; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 17; S. N. Eisenstadt, "Friendship and the Structure of Trust and Solidarity in Society," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 139.

5. Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 141; see also Max Scheler, The Nature of Sympathy (London: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1954); and Lawrence A. Blum, Friendship, Altruism, and Morality (London: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1980).

6. See discussions in Paine, "Search of Friendship"; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 17; and Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 140.

7. Simmel, Sociology, 78-79, 317-29. See chapter 4.

8. DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 16, 28-29.

9. Paul Lazarsfeld and Robert K. Merton, "Friendship as a Social Process," in Freedom and Control in Modern Society, ed. M. Berger, T. Abel, and C. Page (New York: D. Van Nostrand, 1954), 18-66; Edward O. Laumann, Bonds of Pluralism (New York: John Wiley and Sons, 1973); Robert Max Jackson, "Social Structure and Process in Friendship Choice," in Claude S. Fischer et al., Networks and Places (New York: Free Press, 1977); Irwin Altman and Dalmas A. Taylor, Social Penetration (New York: Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1973); and Steve W Duck and R. Gilmour, eds., Personal Relationship, vols. 1-6 (London: Academic Press, 1981-1985).

10. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 510-11.

11. Graham Allan, A Sociology of Friendship and Kinship (London: George Allen and Unwin, 1979), 17.

12. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 512.

13. S. N. Eisenstadt, "Ritualized Personal Relations," Man 56 (1956):

90-95; Robert Paine, "Anthropological Approaches to Friendships," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 4-6.

14. Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 140-41.

15. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 510-12; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 16.

16. See also Robert R. Bell, Worlds of Friendship (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1981), 68.

17. Barry Wellman, "Paid Work, Domestic Work, and Network," in Understanding Personal Relationships, ed. Steve W. Duck and Daniel Perlman (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1985), 169-70; Lillian Rubin, Just Friends (New York: Harper and Row, 1985), 68; see also Bell, Worlds, 60.

18. Carol B. Stack, All Our Kin (New York: Harper and Row, 1974), ch. 7.

19. Ibid., 39.

20. Nancy Chodorow, The Reproduction of Mothering (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1978), ch. 12.

21. Harry T. Reis, Marilyn Senchak, and Beth Solomon, "Sex Differences in the Intimacy of Social Interaction: Further Examination of Potential Explanations," Journal of Personality and Social Interaction 48 (1985): 1204-17.

22. See William J. Goode, "Why Men Resist," in Rethinking the Family, ed. Barrie Thorne (New York: Longman, 1982), 131-50.

23. Michael Argyl and Adrian Farnham, "Sources of Satisfaction and Conflict in Long-Term Relationships," Journal of Marriage and the Family 45 (1983): 490-91; Harriet Braiker and Harold H. Kelly, "Conflict in the Development of Close Relationships," in Social Exchange in Developing Relationships, ed. Robert L. Burgess and Ted L. Huston (New York: Academic Press, 1979), 152.

24. Deborah E. Belle, "The Impact of Poverty on Social Networks and Supports," in The Ties That Bind, ed. Laura Lein and Marvin B. Sussman (New York: Haworth Press, 1983), 89-104; Dair L. Gillespie, Richard S. Krannich, and Ann Leffler, "The Missing Cell: Amiability, Hostility, and Gender Differentiation in Rural Community Networks," Social Science Journal 22 (1985): 17-30; Claude S. Fischer, To Dwell Among Friends (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1982), 136; Ann Leffler, Richard S. Krannich, and Dair L. Gillespie, "Contact, Support, and Friction: Three Faces of Networks in Community Life," Sociological Perspectives 29 (July 1986): 337-56; Barry Wellman, "Applying Network Analysis to the Study of Support," in Social Networks and Social Support, ed. Benjamin H. Gottlieb (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1981), 179-81.

25. Blum, Friendship, Altruism, 124.

26. Robert Jackson finds that people often perceive far-away friends

and kin as close; he maintains that otherwise they would probably not keep up the effort to stay in touch. Close far-away friends remain friends; others who are not close drop away (Jackson, "Friendship Choice," 48-49); Fischer, To Dwell, 172.

27. Fischer, To Dwell, 362.

28. Ibid., 90.

29. Ann Steuve and Laura Lein, "Problems in Network Analysis: The Case of the Missing Person," manuscript, Wellesley College Center for Research on Women, 1979.

30. Fischer, To Dwell, 106; Wellman, "Paid Work," 168-69; Claude S. Fischer and Stacey J. Oliker, "A Research Note on Friendship, Gender, and the Life Cycle," Social Forces 62 (1983): 126-27.

31. Fischer, To Dwell, 102; see Wellman, "Paid Work," 169, 186.

32. See also Fischer, To Dwell, 102.

33. Lazarsfeld and Merton, "Friendship"; Laumann, Bonds; Jackson, "Friendship Choice"; Fischer, To Dwell, 181.

34. Myra Marx Ferree, "Working-Class Jobs: Housework and Paid Work as Sources of Satisfaction," Social Problems 23 (1976): 431-41.

35. Jackson, "Friendship Choice," 73; Fischer, To Dwell, ch. 14.

36. Jackson, "Friendship Choice."

37. I am making a speculative comparison with Robert Jackson's large survey of men's friendships, which indicates greater economic similarity than I found here. And his category of "friends" includes kin friends, who tend to be less economically similar than nonkin. See also note 17 above.

38. See also Claude S. Fischer, "What Do We Mean By 'Friend'? An Inductive Study," Social Networks 3 (1982): 287-306.

39. See note 24 above.

40. Rubin, Just Friends, 139-40.

41. Nicholas Babchuk and Alan E Bates, "The Primary Relations of Middle-Class Couples: A Study in Male Dominance," American Sociological Review 28 (1963): 380.

42. Other studies agree on the nature of men's networks: see Well- man, "Paid Work," 167-68; and Rubin, Just Friends, 60.

43. Fischer, To Dwell; Fischer and Oliker, "Friendship, Gender"; Claude S. Fischer and Susan L. Phillips, "Who Is Alone: Social Characteristics of Respondents with Small Networks," in Loneliness: A Source-book of Theory, Research, and Therapy, ed. L. A. Peplau and D. Perlman (New York: John Wiley and Sons, 1982).