1. Georg Simmel, The Sociology of Georg Simmel, ed. Kurt H. Wolff (New York: Free Press, 1950), 325. [BACK]

2. Ralph Linton, cited by Cora DuBois, "The Gratuitous Act: An Introduction to the Comparative Study of Friendship Patterns," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 30; Gerald D. Suttles, "Friendship as a Social Institution," in Social Relationships, ed. George McCall et al. (Chicago: Aldine Publishing, 1970), 96-98. [BACK]

3. Robert Paine, "In Search of Friendship: An Exploratory Analysis in Middle-Class Culture," Man 4 (1969): 514. [BACK]

4. Ibid.; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 17; S. N. Eisenstadt, "Friendship and the Structure of Trust and Solidarity in Society," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 139. [BACK]

5. Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 141; see also Max Scheler, The Nature of Sympathy (London: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1954); and Lawrence A. Blum, Friendship, Altruism, and Morality (London: Routledge and Kegan Paul, 1980). [BACK]

6. See discussions in Paine, "Search of Friendship"; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 17; and Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 140. [BACK]

7. Simmel, Sociology, 78-79, 317-29. See chapter 4. [BACK]

8. DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 16, 28-29. [BACK]

9. Paul Lazarsfeld and Robert K. Merton, "Friendship as a Social Process," in Freedom and Control in Modern Society, ed. M. Berger, T. Abel, and C. Page (New York: D. Van Nostrand, 1954), 18-66; Edward O. Laumann, Bonds of Pluralism (New York: John Wiley and Sons, 1973); Robert Max Jackson, "Social Structure and Process in Friendship Choice," in Claude S. Fischer et al., Networks and Places (New York: Free Press, 1977); Irwin Altman and Dalmas A. Taylor, Social Penetration (New York: Holt, Rinehart and Winston, 1973); and Steve W Duck and R. Gilmour, eds., Personal Relationship, vols. 1-6 (London: Academic Press, 1981-1985). [BACK]

10. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 510-11. [BACK]

11. Graham Allan, A Sociology of Friendship and Kinship (London: George Allen and Unwin, 1979), 17. [BACK]

12. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 512. [BACK]

13. S. N. Eisenstadt, "Ritualized Personal Relations," Man 56 (1956):

90-95; Robert Paine, "Anthropological Approaches to Friendships," in The Compact, ed. Elliott Leyton (Newfoundland: Memorial University of Newfoundland, 1974), 4-6. [BACK]

14. Eisenstadt, "Friendship," 140-41. [BACK]

15. Paine, "Search of Friendship," 510-12; DuBois, "Gratuitous Act," 16. [BACK]

16. See also Robert R. Bell, Worlds of Friendship (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1981), 68. [BACK]

17. Barry Wellman, "Paid Work, Domestic Work, and Network," in Understanding Personal Relationships, ed. Steve W. Duck and Daniel Perlman (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1985), 169-70; Lillian Rubin, Just Friends (New York: Harper and Row, 1985), 68; see also Bell, Worlds, 60. [BACK]

19. Ibid., 39. [BACK]

20. Nancy Chodorow, The Reproduction of Mothering (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1978), ch. 12. [BACK]

21. Harry T. Reis, Marilyn Senchak, and Beth Solomon, "Sex Differences in the Intimacy of Social Interaction: Further Examination of Potential Explanations," Journal of Personality and Social Interaction 48 (1985): 1204-17. [BACK]

22. See William J. Goode, "Why Men Resist," in Rethinking the Family, ed. Barrie Thorne (New York: Longman, 1982), 131-50. [BACK]

23. Michael Argyl and Adrian Farnham, "Sources of Satisfaction and Conflict in Long-Term Relationships," Journal of Marriage and the Family 45 (1983): 490-91; Harriet Braiker and Harold H. Kelly, "Conflict in the Development of Close Relationships," in Social Exchange in Developing Relationships, ed. Robert L. Burgess and Ted L. Huston (New York: Academic Press, 1979), 152. [BACK]

24. Deborah E. Belle, "The Impact of Poverty on Social Networks and Supports," in The Ties That Bind, ed. Laura Lein and Marvin B. Sussman (New York: Haworth Press, 1983), 89-104; Dair L. Gillespie, Richard S. Krannich, and Ann Leffler, "The Missing Cell: Amiability, Hostility, and Gender Differentiation in Rural Community Networks," Social Science Journal 22 (1985): 17-30; Claude S. Fischer, To Dwell Among Friends (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1982), 136; Ann Leffler, Richard S. Krannich, and Dair L. Gillespie, "Contact, Support, and Friction: Three Faces of Networks in Community Life," Sociological Perspectives 29 (July 1986): 337-56; Barry Wellman, "Applying Network Analysis to the Study of Support," in Social Networks and Social Support, ed. Benjamin H. Gottlieb (Beverly Hills, Ca.: Sage, 1981), 179-81. [BACK]

25. Blum, Friendship, Altruism, 124. [BACK]

26. Robert Jackson finds that people often perceive far-away friends

and kin as close; he maintains that otherwise they would probably not keep up the effort to stay in touch. Close far-away friends remain friends; others who are not close drop away (Jackson, "Friendship Choice," 48-49); Fischer, To Dwell, 172. [BACK]

27. Fischer, To Dwell, 362. [BACK]

28. Ibid., 90. [BACK]

29. Ann Steuve and Laura Lein, "Problems in Network Analysis: The Case of the Missing Person," manuscript, Wellesley College Center for Research on Women, 1979. [BACK]

30. Fischer, To Dwell, 106; Wellman, "Paid Work," 168-69; Claude S. Fischer and Stacey J. Oliker, "A Research Note on Friendship, Gender, and the Life Cycle," Social Forces 62 (1983): 126-27. [BACK]

31. Fischer, To Dwell, 102; see Wellman, "Paid Work," 169, 186. [BACK]

32. See also Fischer, To Dwell, 102. [BACK]

33. Lazarsfeld and Merton, "Friendship"; Laumann, Bonds; Jackson, "Friendship Choice"; Fischer, To Dwell, 181. [BACK]

34. Myra Marx Ferree, "Working-Class Jobs: Housework and Paid Work as Sources of Satisfaction," Social Problems 23 (1976): 431-41. [BACK]

35. Jackson, "Friendship Choice," 73; Fischer, To Dwell, ch. 14. [BACK]

36. Jackson, "Friendship Choice." [BACK]

37. I am making a speculative comparison with Robert Jackson's large survey of men's friendships, which indicates greater economic similarity than I found here. And his category of "friends" includes kin friends, who tend to be less economically similar than nonkin. See also note 17 above. [BACK]

38. See also Claude S. Fischer, "What Do We Mean By 'Friend'? An Inductive Study," Social Networks 3 (1982): 287-306. [BACK]

39. See note 24 above. [BACK]

40. Rubin, Just Friends, 139-40. [BACK]

41. Nicholas Babchuk and Alan E Bates, "The Primary Relations of Middle-Class Couples: A Study in Male Dominance," American Sociological Review 28 (1963): 380. [BACK]

42. Other studies agree on the nature of men's networks: see Well- man, "Paid Work," 167-68; and Rubin, Just Friends, 60. [BACK]

43. Fischer, To Dwell; Fischer and Oliker, "Friendship, Gender"; Claude S. Fischer and Susan L. Phillips, "Who Is Alone: Social Characteristics of Respondents with Small Networks," in Loneliness: A Source-book of Theory, Research, and Therapy, ed. L. A. Peplau and D. Perlman (New York: John Wiley and Sons, 1982). [BACK]