1. Geng, "Requiem for the Women's Movement." [BACK]

2. See especially Frye, Politics of Reality, and more recently, MacKinnon, Feminism Unmodified. [BACK]

3. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering; and Dinnerstein, Mermaid and Minotaur. See also Chodorow, "Feminism and Difference." [BACK]

4. "Missing Feminist Revolution." See also Harding, "Analytical Categories of Feminist Theory" and Science Question in Feminism. [BACK]

5. Lorde, Sister Outsider, p. 110. [BACK]

6. The concept of role has been criticized by many feminists, most notably Barrie Thorne (see "Gender," and Stacey and Thorne, "Missing Feminist Revolution"). Among other things, Thorne points out that the term role masks power differences, but I use the distinction between mother role and wife role precisely to emphasize the differential power the two roles carry. I agree, however, that the term gender role as a unitary concept is not useful. I also agree that role is not a particularly useful term in describing informal spontaneous interactions, such as children's play, but even at this level role is useful because children often act out their perceptions of adult roles, especially those of mother and father, wife and husband. [BACK]

7. Marxist feminists have analyzed women's situation in terms of the work they do, especially housework. While wives often do housework, I will maintain that inequality does not so much inhere in what women do, as in the nature of the relationship defined by the terms husband and wife. [BACK]

8. Gayle Rubin ("Traffic in Women") and Juliet Mitchell ( Psychoanalysis and Feminism ) are feminists who have also analyzed male domi- soft

nance. They do so from a more phallocentric psychoanalytic perspective. Interestingly enough, they also concluded that the solution to male dominance is shared child care, which they argued would render children bisexual. They have both since changed their views. [BACK]

9. See Parsons, Social Structure and Personality, especially the essays in Part 1. See also Parsons, "The Position of Identity in the General Theory of Action," and Parsons and Bales, Family Socialization. [BACK]

10. I am adopting the idea of using "feminist movement" instead of "the feminist movement" from Bell Hooks (see Feminist Theory. ) I hope this usage comes to be widely accepted, because it suggests process and progress rather than a state, and it implies an ongoing stream of feminist thought that includes diversity and contradictions. [BACK]

1. Lorber, "Minimalist and Maximalist Feminist Ideologies," cites a lecture given by Stimpson in 1980, entitled "The New Scholarship about Women: The State of the Art," at the City University of New York Graduate Center, New York City, October 6. Stimpson has continued to use this distinction in her lectures up to the present. [BACK]

2. See Gordon, "Feminism, Reproduction, and the Family." [BACK]

3. For an excellent description of the vicissitudes of the tension between similarity and difference in gender roles and gender symbolism that goes back to the beginnings of the modern world in the sixteenth century, see Bloch, "Untangling the Roots." [BACK]

4. Ehrenreich and English, Introduction to For Her Own Good. [BACK]

5. For summaries see Degler, At Odds; Ryan, Womanhood in America; Rothman, Woman's Proper Place. [BACK]

6. For a good sampling of differing perspectives among feminist historians on the tension between women's rights versus women's culture in the nineteenth century see Walkowitz et al., "Politics and Culture in Women's History." [BACK]

7. In 1985 the median full-time earnings for women were 65 percent of men's earnings, and 56 percent of women working in the civilian labor force were married. [BACK]

8. Friedan, Feminine Mystique; Rossi, "An Immodest Proposal"; Firestone, Dialectic of Sex. [BACK]

9. See, for example. Bunch, "Lesbians in Revolt." Myron and Bunch, Lesbianism and the Women's Movement contains a number of other early lesbian feminist analyses. [BACK]

10. See "Institution of Sexual Intercourse." [BACK]

11. For a more recent version of the radical feminist argument against continue

difference, see Ringelheim, "Women and the Holocaust." Ringelheim describes how she now rejects her emphasis on women's special virtues in caring for one another in a way men did not while imprisoned during the holocaust. She became convinced (apparently by Ti Grace Atkinson) that her focus on difference detracted from a focus on women's oppression and a willingness to fight that oppression. The argument is that if difference exists in the context of oppression (no theory here about causation), to emphasize or point to difference is to valorize oppression. The terms of her argument are so general that it is difficult for me to see its logic. In this book I try to break down difference into two aspects and argue that their relationship to oppression needs to be analyzed separately. [BACK]

12. Kanter, "Women and the Structure of Organizations." [BACK]

13. Kessler and McKenna, Gender. [BACK]

14. Weisstein, "'Kinder, Küche, Kirche.'" Lipman-Blumen, Gender Roles and Power, pp. 69-98. Unger, Female and Male; see especially Chapter 1. [BACK]

15. Goldberg, Inevitability of Patriarchy. [BACK]

16. In later interviews, de Beauvoir continued to associate femininity with being "secondary," "modest," and "powerless." Asked how we might break out of this vicious circle of "femininity," de Beauvoir acknowledged that there are problems with women's "joining the rat race with men" but that it is necessary to gain power. De Beauvoir never approved of much of anything about women, including motherhood, which she described in The Second Sex as passive and debilitating. She also continued to be irritated when she was accused of saying this or that because she was a woman (Schwarzer, After the Second Sex, especially pp. 115-18). To me this suggests a reluctance to identify with women. [BACK]

17. Barrett, Women's Oppression Today. [BACK]

18. See especially Gyn/Ecology. [BACK]

19. Rossi, "Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." Smith-Rosenberg, "Female World of Love and Ritual." Bernard, Female World. Smith, "Women's Perspective." See also Smith, "Sociology for Women," and Daniels, "Feminist Perspectives." [BACK]

20. On mothering as a basis for gender difference, see Ruddick, "Maternal Thinking," and Rich, Of Woman Born. On mothering as a cause of gender difference, Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering ; Keller, "Gender and Science"; Benjamin, "Bonds of Love." [BACK]

21. Gilligan, In a Different Voice. [BACK]

22. For an excellent discussion of some of the dangers and excesses involved in the difference position, especially with regard to the family, see Stacey, "New Conservative Feminism," [BACK]

23. Chodorow, "Feminism and Difference." break [BACK]

24. Elshtain seems to come close to this position at times, but I believe her intent is to critique the public sphere by citing the virtues that are now realized only in the private sphere. See "Antigone's Daughters." [BACK]

25. Wives of course may "mother" their husbands, but when they do, it is in a context of dependency on them. [BACK]

26. Tiger and Fox, Imperial Animal, p. 110. [BACK]

27. Sacks, Sisters and Wives. [BACK]

28. Rossi makes the point that in this society women's mothering has been subordinated to men's sexuality. She argues that while children are of importance to women in and of themselves, men tend to view children as consequences of or appendages to mating. See "Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." [BACK]

29. See O'Brien, Politics of Reproduction, and "Dialectics of Reproduction." [BACK]

30. M. O'Brien, Politics of Reproduction, p. 50. [BACK]

31. M. O'Brien, "Dialectics of Reproduction," p. 236. [BACK]

32. Lévi-Strauss, Elementary Structures of Kinship. K. Paige and J. Paige, Politics of Reproductive Ritual. [BACK]

33. M. O'Brien, "Dialectics of Reproduction," p. 235. [BACK]

34. M. O'Brien, Politics of Reproduction, p. 91. [BACK]

35. Holter, "The Reorganized Patriarchy." [BACK]

36. Ruddick, "Maternal Thinking." [BACK]

37. Most notably, Friday, My Mother/My Self. [BACK]

38. Barry, Female Sexual Slavery. MacKinnon, Sexual Harassment. [BACK]

39. See, for example, the critique of Rich made by Ferguson, "Patriarchy, Sexual Identity." [BACK]

40. Ti Grace Atkinson, "Institution of Sexual Intercourse." [BACK]

41. Wittig, Les Guerillères, and especially "One Is Not Born a Woman." [BACK]

42. Shaktini makes this clear in "Displacing the Phallic Subject." [BACK]

43. Allen, "Motherhood." [BACK]

44. Pogrebin, Growing Up Free, p. 40. [BACK]

45. Ryan, Womanhood in America, pp. 337-39. [BACK]

46. Lamphere, "Review Essay," p. 622. [BACK]

47. Lloyd, "Yoruba of Nigeria." [BACK]

48. D. O'Brien, "Female Husbands." For instance, over forty African populations have the status of "female husbands." While woman-woman marriages are often a mechanism for a wealthy patriarch to hold on to valuable resources in the absence of male heirs, in those cases where a woman moves into an extradomestic status of high prestige on her own, such as political leader or diviner, she must take on the social role of "husband" and head of a household. Even though most female husbands are not powerful in their own right, it would be anomalous for those who have power to be in the role of "wife." break [BACK]

49. About five out of six men and about three out of four women remarry after a divorce (Cherlin, Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage ). Men typically spend less time separated and divorced than women. White males spend more time married than any other group, and black females the least. (Espenshade, "Marriage Trends in America," especially pp. 210-12.) [BACK]

50. Between 1940 and 1980 the proportion of births outside marriage increased from less than 4 percent to over 18 percent and continues to rise. This increase in births to never-married women is not the result of an increased rate of childbearing by unmarried women, however, but mainly the result of an increase in the number of unmarried women "at risk" of bearing a child. Between 1970 and 1979 the number of nonmarital births increased by roughly 50 percent, while the nonmarital fertility rate went up by only 5.3 percent. (Espenshade, "Marriage Trends in America.") [BACK]

1. Ms. magazine named Gilligan "Woman of the Year" in January 1984. [BACK]

2. Linda K. Kerber, "Some Cautionary Words for Historians," in "On In a Different Voice: An Interdisciplinary Forum," Signs 11 (1986): 304-33 (pp. 304-10). [BACK]

3. Catherine G. Greeno and Eleanor E. Maccoby, "How Different Is the 'Different Voice,'" in ibid., pp. 310-16; and Zella Luria, "A Methodological Critique," in ibid., pp. 316-21. Several suggest that the differences Gilligan is talking about may relate to class, not gender. Others maintain that in studies of actual behaviors, as opposed to stated orientations, the differences do not show up so clearly. It depends on the measure. In my view the differences are blatantly apparent if one considers gender differences in violent crime and sexual assault, to take an extreme example. [BACK]

4. Stack, "The Culture of Gender: Men and Women of Color," in ibid., pp. 321-24. [BACK]

5. See "Reply by Carol Gilligan," in ibid., pp. 324-33, especially p. 328. Philosophical and methodological critiques of Gilligan may be found in the entire issue of Social Research, 50, no. 3 (1983). [BACK]

6. For a fuller discussion of the various stages and transitions in women's moral development, see Gilligan's article, "In a Different Voice." [BACK]

7. Belenky et al., Women's Ways of Knowing. Significantly enough the authors report that mothers were very often the empowering persons in the lives of the women they interviewed. [BACK]

8. Gutmann, "Female Ego Styles." Bakan, Quality of Human Existence. The instrumental-expressive distinction was first explicitly formulated by Parsons, Social System, and by Parsons and Shils, General Theory, pt. 2. Partially because of the development of his four-dimensional conception of action space, the definitions of instrumental and expressive continue

were somewhat altered in Parsons, Bales, and Shils, Working Papers. Throughout all these works the terms were never defined clearly, and Parsons tackled the definitional problem only indirectly by trying to link the concepts with other elements in the scheme. Later he dropped these terms almost entirely as analytical variables as he developed farther his fourfold conception of action space: adaptation, goal attainment, integration, and latent pattern maintenance. [BACK]

9. Carlson, "Sex Differences in Ego Functioning," and "Understanding Women." [BACK]

10. Bakan, Quality of Human Existence, p. 15. [BACK]

11. Carlson, "Understanding Women." [BACK]

12. Carlson, "Sex Differences in Ego Functioning." [BACK]

13. Jeanne Block, "Conceptions of Sex Role." [BACK]

14. Finigan, "Effects of Token Representation." [BACK]

15. The term expressive is something of a misnomer but not entirely. Perhaps a better term for what its definition describes would be relational. Nevertheless, I will continue to use expressive along with relational because I do not want to lose entirely the connotation of "feeling" that expressiveness carries. Relationships themselves cannot be encompassed or thought about without taking feeling into account. Expressive symbolism and expressive patterns are used to define relationships when they are the primary focus of interest. [BACK]

16. When Parsons applies the terms expressive and instrumental to family roles, he explicitly does not see them as carrying differential power. Rather, he treats the difference between instrumental and expressive as descriptive of the gender axis in the family; he treats the generational difference between parents and children as the power axis. In spite of this apparent symmetry, however, Parsons makes clear that the female role is a major locus of strain within the family, in part because the culture itself has such a strong instrumental bias. [BACK]

17. Lewin, in "Psychological Measures," claims that instrumental and expressive are simply "euphemisms for 'dominant' and 'subordinate'" (p. 195). This distorts Parsons's position, as I will try to show in the discussion to follow. (See also note 16.) In the rush to discover and repudiate sexism in all past "scientific" conceptualizations, we may find ourselves prematurely abandoning exactly that which requires examination. The problem is not to start from scratch but to examine in new ways what "is known." [BACK]

18. Hochschild, Managed Heart, pp. 164—65. [BACK]

19. Gough and Heilbrun, Joint Manual. [BACK]

20. The word obliging and perhaps others may seem to some to connote a yielding acquiescence, but perhaps only from an instrumental continue

point of view. Being helpful does not necessarily make one a doormat. When one looks at intercorrelations, men are more likely than women to see relational or expressive traits as being associated with passivity and dependence. [BACK]

21. Bennett and Cohen, "Men and Women," p. 125. [BACK]

22. For the detailed report of this study, see M. Johnson et al., "Expressiveness Re-evaluated." [BACK]

23. In these analyses we excluded the items chosen to represent the negative versions of each of the three dimensions under investigation. [BACK]

24. This is only one of several ways that our analysis differs from the analysis Alice Echols attributes to what she calls "cultural feminists." See "New Feminism of Yin and Yang." [BACK]

25. On the multidimensionality of masculinity and femininity, see E. Lewis, Developing Woman's Potential, pp. 69-71. For an excellent summary of earlier scales, see Constantinople, "Masculinity-Femininity." [BACK]

26. Bem, "Measurement of Psychological Androgyny." [BACK]

27. Spence and Helmreich, Masculinity and Femininity. [BACK]

28. Jones, Chernhovetz, and Hansson, "Enigma of Androgyny"; K. Morgan, "Androgyny"; Pedhazur and Tetenbaum, "Bem Sex Role Inventory"; Locksley and Cotten, "Psychological Androgyny." [BACK]

29. Mary Daly, "Qualitative Leap Beyond Patriarchal Religion," expressed this idea many years ago in her comment that androgyny seems to mean combining John Wayne and Brigitte Bardot. The particular personalities used in the analogy need to be constantly updated, but the idea remains the same: a "man's man" and a "man's toy" combined in the same person can hardly solve the problem of the devaluation of women. [BACK]

30. Bem, "Sex Role Adaptability." [BACK]

31. For a discussion of these other studies, see Gill et al., "Measuring Gender Differences." [BACK]

32. The prevalence of the belief that "male equals human" was documented early on by Broverman et al., "Sex Role Stereotypes." [BACK]

33. Bem, "Gender Schema Theory." [BACK]

34. See also Eichenbaum with Orbach, What Do Women Want? [BACK]

35. For the annals of not-so-trivial trivia, I must note that Bardwick and Douvan, "Ambivalence," attribute this quote to Talcott Parsons in a 1942 article. This is an error of course. This statement in no way reflects Parsons's thinking in the article cited or in any other article of his. [BACK]

36. L. Rubin, Women of a Certain Age, especially the chapter "Who Am I, The Elusive Self." [BACK]

37. Gottfried, "Feminism and College Educated Women." [BACK]

38. J. Miller, New Psychology of Women, especially p. 89. [BACK]

39. See Stockard and Wood, "Myth of Female Underachievement." break [BACK]

40. Vanek, "Household Work." [BACK]

41. I am indebted to Hanne Haavind of the University of Oslo for this illustration. [BACK]

42. Gove and Hughes, "Sex Differences in Physical Health." [BACK]

43. Maccoby and Jacklin, Psychology of Sex Differences. [BACK]

44. Martin, "Maternal and Paternal Abuse." [BACK]

45. Frodi, Macauley, and Thome, "Are Women Always Less Aggressive?" [BACK]

46. Maccoby and Jacklin, "Sex Differences in Aggression." See also Maccoby, Social Development, p. 216. Here she reiterates that "the tendency in males to be more aggressive than females is perhaps the most firmly established gender difference and is a characteristic that transcends culture." For a review of gender and aggression studies, see White, "Sex and Gender Issues." White emphasizes the role of learning and the variability of aggression depending on the definition of the situation. White suggests that women and men do not "really" differ much in aggression, perhaps because she also accepts the view that male "aggression" somehow explains male dominance. [BACK]

47. Newton, Maternal Emotions. [BACK]

48. Barbara Ehrenreich suggests that this new emphasis may be associated with preserving class boundaries and consumerism. See "Feminist's View." [BACK]

49. M. Goodwin and C. Goodwin, "Children's Arguing." [BACK]

1. For other summaries and critiques, see the articles in part 2 of Trebilcot, ed., Mothering. See also Gottlieb, "Mothering and Reproduction of Power." [BACK]

2. Although Chodorow uses the argument relating male dominance to women's mothering in Reproduction of Mothering, it is not the central theme of her book. The hypothesis was, however, an important theme in Chodorow's earlier work, and she developed a slightly different version of it in "Feminism and Difference." [BACK]

3. See Mitchell, Psychoanalysis and Feminism, p. 120. [BACK]

4. Klein, Psychoanalysis of Children, p. 338. See also "Early Stages of Oedipus Conflict." [BACK]

5. Horney, "Dread of Woman," especially pp. 145-46. [BACK]

6. Karen Horney, "Flight from Womanhood," especially pp. 176-77. [BACK]

7. Mead, "Freud's View of Female Psychology," especially p. 97. [BACK]

8. Before Dinnerstein's book, the best popular work that clearly attempted to relate human institutional arrangements, including the exclu- soft

sion of women from male affairs, to men's fear and envy of women was The Dangerous Sex by H. R. Hays, first published in 1964. Hays argues that social institutions in societies from the most primitive to the most modern have been designed to defend men against their fears of women by circumscribing, regulating, and containing women. He ends with a plea not for equal parenting but for men to abandon their magical approach to women, to accept their existential anguish, and to realize that the menace of the female lies within themselves (p. 283, 1972 ed.). [BACK]

9. Dinnerstein, Mermaid and Minotaur, p. 95. [BACK]

10. In their article, "Fantasy of the Perfect Mother," Chodorow and Contratto contend that many feminists display primary process thinking with regard to mothers. Feminists have tended to talk either about the malevolence of mothers or they have overidealized motherhood. In either case, "the fantasy of the perfect mother" underlies these responses. [BACK]

11. W. Miller, "Lower Class Culture," especially p. 270. [BACK]

12. Rohrer and Edmonson, Eighth Generation, pp. 162-63. [BACK]

13. Parsons, "Certain Primary Sources and Patterns of Aggression in the Social Structure of the Western World," in his Essays in Sociological Theory, pp. 298-322. [BACK]

14. Fiedler, Return of Vanishing American. [BACK]

15. J. Whiting, Kluckhohn, and Anthony, "Male Initiation Rites," and Burton and J. Whiting, "Absent Father." [BACK]

16. Bacon, Child, and Barry, "Cross-Cultural Study." [BACK]

17. B. Whiting, "Sex Identity Conflict." [BACK]

18. Hartley, "Sex-role Pressures." [BACK]

19. David and Brannon, eds., Forty-nine Percent Majority. [BACK]

20. Chodorow's earlier article, "Being and Doing," discusses male misogyny more from the standpoint of the fear and envy hypothesis than from the tenuous gender identity standpoint. [BACK]

21. Stockard and Johnson, "Social Origins of Male Dominance." [BACK]

22. Money and Ehrhardt, Man and Woman. [BACK]

23. Stoller, "Freud's Concept of Bisexuality." [BACK]

24. B. Whiting, "Sex Identity Conflict." [BACK]

25. For a more detailed discussion and critique of Pleck, see my review in American Journal of Sociology. [BACK]

26. See especially Chodorow, "Feminism and Difference," pp. 13-14. [BACK]

27. See especially M. Johnson, "Fathers, Mothers, and Sex Typing." [BACK]

28. Tooley, "Johnny, I Hardly Knew Ye." [BACK]

29. See chapter "The Critique of Masculinity," in Eisenstein, Contemporary Feminist Thought, pp. 96-101, especially p. 101. [BACK]

30. Keller, "Gender and Science" and "Feminism and Science"; see also Reflections on Gender and Science. break [BACK]

31. Benjamin, "Oedipal Riddle," p. 209. [BACK]

32. Keller, "Gender and Science." [BACK]

33. Benjamin, "Bonds of Love." [BACK]

34. Benjamin, "Bonds of Love," p. 167. [BACK]

35. Benjamin suggests that mothers may be making differentiation harder for their children because their lack of autonomous roles outside of the family gives them little else in which to invest except their children. Mothers' lack of autonomous roles may make it difficult for mothers to tolerate and encourage their children's differentiation. Benjamin's idea has been developed slightly differently by Philipson in "Narcissism and Mothering." She argues that the narcissistic personality of today is a result of the situation in which women mothered in the 1950s. These mothers were so frustrated by their isolation and the heavy expectations placed on them that they were unable to be sensitive to the child's need for autonomy and could not empathize with the child, but responded instead to the child in terms of their own needs. How women's isolation in the home might have affected the quality of their mothering is a complex issue and one that must be kept analytically separate from that of how the mother is perceived by the child. Benjamins brief remarks tend to confuse the two. [BACK]

36. Benjamin, "Oedipal Riddle," p. 220. [BACK]

37. Peterfreund, "Psychoanalytic Conceptualizations of Infancy." See also Greenberg and S. Mitchell, Object Relations in Psychoanalytic Theory, and Horner, "Psychic Life of the Young Infant." [BACK]

38. Stern, Interpersonal World of the Infant, especially p. 10. [BACK]

39. For a discussion of various developmental approaches to the emergence of self during infancy, see Harter, "Developmental Perspectives." [BACK]

40. Chodorow discusses some of these issues in "Feminism and Difference." [BACK]

1. To say that women have been primarily responsible for mothering in all societies does not mean that women have regularly mothered their own biological children or that all women have mothered. For example, in the early days of capitalism and urban industrialization in France and other countries, mothers in the middle and working classes gave their babies over to the care of wet nurses in the country (see Badinter, Mother Love ). [BACK]

2. For a discussion of the degree to which the kibbutz experiment did not begin with similar roles for women and men, see Blasi, review of Gender and Culture by Spiro. [BACK]

3. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering. break [BACK]

4. Rossi, "Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." Others who agree with Rossi's point of view include Dan and Newton, comments in "Considering a Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." [BACK]

5. Janet Sayers does this in Biological Politics. [BACK]

6. See Rossi, "Gender and Parenthood," especially p. 15. See also Dan and Newton, comments in "Considering a Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." [BACK]

7. See for example, Fausto-Sterling, Myths of Gender; Bleier, Science and Gender; Lowe and Hubbard, eds., Woman's Nature; and Sayers, Biological Politics. These books differ in perspective, but they all basically argue against biological determinism while they at the same time carefully examine biological factors. Sayers argues for a middle position within feminism between "biological essentialism" and what she calls "social constructionism." The other three books are more suspicious of biological influence but move us toward a more complex view of the interactions between body, mind, and culture. Bleier, for example, in her chapter on the brain points to the remarkable flexibility of the human brain and argues that culture constrains the brain far more than the brain sets limits to culture. [BACK]

8. See the group of articles by radical feminists in Trebilcot, ed., Mothering. These include Allen, "Motherhood"; Valeska, "If All Else Fails"; and Polatnick, "Why Men Don't Rear Children." Something of this same position is also taken by the Marxist-feminist Gimenez in "Feminism, Pronatalism, and Motherhood." [BACK]

9. Firestone, Dialectic of Sex. [BACK]

10. Rossi, "Transition to Parenthood." [BACK]

11. Bane, Here To Stay; Cherlin, Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage. [BACK]

12. See Fairbairn, Object-Relations Theory of Personality, and Guntrip, Personality Structure and Human Interaction. See also, Greenberg and Mitchell, Object Relations in Psychoanalytic Theory. [BACK]

13. See Parsons with White, "The Link Between Character and Society," in Parsons, Social Structure and Personality, pp. 183-235; and Horkheimer, "Authority and the Family." [BACK]

14. Cf. Eisenstein, Contemporary Feminist Thought, p. 91. Eisenstein appears to misunderstand Freud on this point. [BACK]

15. Person takes a similar view in "Sexuality as Mainstay of Identity." As I will show in Chapter 8, psychoanalytic theory tends to define what we now call gender in terms of sexuality. This conflation was very basic in Freud's thinking and ultimately renders psychoanalysis a "dangerous doctrine" even in the hands of those with benign intentions. [BACK]

16. Chodorow, "Feminism and Difference." break [BACK]

17. Flax, "Mother-Daughter Relationships," emphasizes the problematic aspects of mothers' ties to daughters. In another view, L. Hoffman, "Early Childhood Experiences," claims that "girls need a little maternal rejection if they are to become independently competent and selfconfident." [BACK]

18. Chodorow stresses heterosexuality even more than my account of her work might suggest. She argues that women's heterosexuality is triangular and requires a third person—a child—for its structural and emotional completion, whereas for men the heterosexual bond alone is sufficient. My account will question all of this. [BACK]

19. Rossi, "Biosocial Perspective on Parenting." [BACK]

20. Sayers, Biological Politics, pp. 149, 161. [BACK]

21. "Reply by Nancy Chodorow," especially p. 507. [BACK]

22. See Chodorow, "Being and Doing," especially pp. 270-86; and "Family Structure and Feminine Personality." [BACK]

23. See Lamphere, "Review Essay: Anthropology," especially p. 622. [BACK]

24. Young, "Male Gender Identity," argues that Chodorow does collapse these categories. I take the view that Chodorow in making the relational-nonrelational distinction between women and men does not imply that women are by definition inferior. She suggests that their relationality connects them with domesticity. This does not necessarily mean "inferiority," although it certainly means that in middle-class white culture. See Strathern, "Domesticity and the Denigration of Women." [BACK]

25. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering, p. 10. [BACK]

26. Parsons, "Social Structure and the Development of Personality," Social Structure and Personality, pp. 78-111, especially p. 91. [BACK]

27. For an excellent discussion of the drive-focused theories of Marcuse and Brown (utilized by Dinnerstein) versus the object relations approach Chodorow favors, see Chodorow, "Beyond Drive Theory." Parsons's work is at a higher level of abstraction and encompasses both the "drive" and the "object relations" aspects of Freud's thinking. [BACK]

28. Rossi discusses this permissiveness in "Maternalism, Sexuality, and New Feminism." [BACK]

29. Maccoby and Jacklin, Psychology of Sex Differences, pp. 313, 201. [BACK]

30. For the association of maternal warmth with conscience in children, see Yarrow, Campbell, and Burton, Child Rearing, p. 103. For the lack of differentiation by gender, see, for example, Stayton, Hogan, and Ainsworth, "Infant Obedience and Maternal Behavior," especially p. 1058. [BACK]

31. Maccoby and Jacklin, "Gender Segregation in Childhood." [BACK]

32. Fagot, "Beyond the Reinforcement Principle." [BACK]

33. Maccoby, "Social Groupings in Childhood." break [BACK]

34. Lever, "Sex Differences in Games." [BACK]

35. Maltz and Borker, "Male-Female Miscommunication." [BACK]

36. M. Goodwin, "Directive-Response Speech Sequences." [BACK]

37. Fagot, "Beyond the Reinforcement Principle." [BACK]

38. Fagot and Leinbach, "Play Styles in Early Childhood," especially p. 113. [BACK]

39. Fagot and Hagan, "Aggression in Toddlers." [BACK]

40. Best, We've All Cot Scars, pp. 71-87. [BACK]

41. Eisenhart and Holland, "Learning Gender from Peers," especially p. 322. [BACK]

42. Carter and McCloskey, "Peers and Sex-Typed Behavior." [BACK]

43. Thorne, "Girls and Boys Together." [BACK]

44. J. Whalen and M. Whalen, "'Doing Gender.'" For "rules" of conversational turn-taking, see West and Zimmerman, "Small Insults." For a discussion of the conversation-sustaining work that women do, see Fishman, "Interaction: The Work Women Do." [BACK]

45. Esposito, "Sex Differences in Children's Conversation." [BACK]

46. M. Goodwin, "Directive-Response Speech Sequences, "especially pp. 170-72. M. Goodwin and C. Goodwin, "Children's Arguing." [BACK]

47. Ullian, "Regression in Service of Male Ego." [BACK]

48. M. Goodwin, "Directive-Response Speech Sequences," pp. 170-72. [BACK]

49. Kinsey, Pomeroy, and Martin, Sexual Behavior in Human Male, p. 168. [BACK]

50. Finkelhor, Sexually Victimized Children, p. 91. [BACK]

51. See Pleck's discussion of this in "Men's Power," p. 424. [BACK]

52. Brownmiller, Against Our Will. See also Griffin, "Rape." [BACK]

53. J. Newson and E. Newson, Four Years Old. [BACK]

54. Quoted in Unger, Female and Male, p. 427. When I tell this story in class, it often evokes the response from males that this surely shows me to be a man-hater. I believe it indicates that men have not yet realized that the fear of rape confines and restricts women as do "the rules" that blame rape on women failing to protect themselves rather than on the men doing the raping. [BACK]

55. For acquaintance rape, see Kanin and Parcell, "Sexual Aggression." See also Kanin, "Date Rape." For rape in marriage, see Russell, Rape in Marriage; and Finkelhor and Yllo, License to Rape. [BACK]

56. Alder, "Self-Reported Sexual Aggression." [BACK]

57. Kanin, "Date Rapists." [BACK]

58. MacKinnon, "Toward Feminist Jurisprudence." See also "An Agenda for Theory." break [BACK]

59. Russell, Sexual Exploitation, especially p. 35. [BACK]

60. See especially West and Zimmerman, "Small Insults," and Fishman, "Interaction: The Work Women Do." [BACK]

61. Pleck, "Men's Power," p. 424. See also Lehne, "Homophobia Among Men." [BACK]

62. Herek, "On Heterosexual Masculinity." [BACK]

63. L. Rubin, Just Friends. See especially pp. 63-64. [BACK]

1. As more research is done on fathers and infants and as theories concerning "stages" in general become more questionable (see Chapter 4), this distinction may become less meaningful. But those who employ psychoanalytic categories assume that the oedipal period initiates the significance of father for children of both sexes. In truth the father's salience in matters pertaining to sexuality seems to occur over and over from infancy to maturity and beyond. I have brought together the research on this in the following articles: M. Johnson, "Sex Role Learning in Nuclear Family," "Fathers, Mothers, and Sex Typing," "Heterosexuality, Male Dominance, and Father Image," and "Fathers and 'Femininity' in Daughters." [BACK]

2. Without explicitly mentioning male dominance, Maccoby and Jacklin observe that the mother-son relationship is not the prototype of adult male-female relations (note the shift in which gender comes first), commenting that "clearly there are instances in which the role demands of parenthood (especially motherhood) are not consistent with habitual male-female interaction patterns" (Psychology of Sex Differences, p. 306). [BACK]

3. Moscovici, Society Against Nature. [BACK]

4. For a summary, see Deaux, "A Decade's Research on Gender." [BACK]

5. Radin, "Childrearing Fathers in Intact Families," part 1. [BACK]

6. For fathers feeling more responsibility toward male children, see Gilbert, Hanson, and Davis, "Parental Role Responsibilities," and Fagot, "Influence of Sex of Child." For fathers' preference for male offspring, see Hoffman, "Changes in Family Roles." For divorced fathers' greater tendency to maintain contact with sons, see Hetherington, "Divorce: A Child's Perspective." [BACK]

7. Margolin and Patterson, "Differential Consequences." [BACK]

8. For differences in punishment, see Finkelhor, "Sexual Climate in Families." For mothers' punishment styles, see Bronfenbrenner, "Familial Antecedents." [BACK]

9. For a summary of the father-infant research, see Parke and Tinsley, "Father's Role in Infancy"; Pederson, ed., Father-Infant Relationship ; continue

Parke, Fathers ; and Ricks, "Father-Infant Interactions." Specifically, for the tendency of fathers, in contrast to mothers, to withdraw from daughters, see M. Lamb and J. Lamb, "Father-Infant Relationship." [BACK]

10. C. Hoffman et al., "Comparison of Interactions." [BACK]

11. For a comparison of gender-stereotyped attitudes, see J. Rubin, Provenzano, and Luria, "Eye of Beholder." For a comparison of encouragement of gender-stereotyped toys and play, see Fagot, "Influence of Sex of Child." See also Langlois and Downs, "Mothers, Fathers, and Peers."

A study designed to determine whether or not fathers treated infants differentially found they did so with regard to physical closeness and discipline and control with twelve-month-old infants (Snow, Jacklin, and Maccoby, "Sex-of-Child Differences").

While most of the studies I am describing refer to the father's behavior, I do not mean to imply that fathers cause differentiation. Male and female infants may in fact be different and their differences in preferences may be able to be reinforced positively or negatively. What psychologists are trying to measure in individuals are often pale reflections of social structural phenomena relating to gender and generation, which cannot be captured when one uses gender-neutral measures. [BACK]

12. A. Heilbrun, Human Sex Role Behavior, pp. 161-62. [BACK]

13. For studies showing greater paternal differentiation, see Jeanne Block, "Conceptions of Sex Role." For differentiation in teaching situations, see Jeanne Block, "Socialization Influences on Personality Development," and "The Pinks and the Blues." For study on parents of toddler children, see Fagot, "Influence of Sex of Child." For fathers' tendency to comfort daughters, see Rothbart and Maccoby, "Parents' Differential Reactions." For fathers' tendency to protect daughters from failure, see Osofsky and O'Connell, "Parent-Child Interaction." [BACK]

14. Radin, "Role of the Father." [BACK]

15. Goodenough, "Interest in Persons." [BACK]

16. Bronstein, "Mothers' and Fathers' Behaviors." [BACK]

17. McBroom, "Parental Relationships." [BACK]

18. Bacon and Ashmore, "Mothers and Fathers Categorize Descriptions." [BACK]

19. Jack Block, Von der Lippe, and Jeanne Block, "Sex Role and Socialization Patterns." [BACK]

20. Kohlberg and Zigler, "Impact of Cognitive Maturity." [BACK]

21. Kundsin, ed., Women and Success . [BACK]

22. Contratto, "Father's Presence." [BACK]

23. Droppleman and Schaefer, "Boys' and Girls' Reports," and Elder and Bowerman, "Family Structure and Child-Rearing Patterns." break [BACK]

24. A. Parsons, "Oedipus Complex." [BACK]

25. Roberts, Kline, and Gagnon, Family Life and Sexual Learning, Vol. 1. See also Kaats and Davis, "Sexual Behavior of College Students." [BACK]

26. I thank Benton Johnson for making the questionnaires available to me for this analysis. The original research is described in Langford, "Religion and Occupational Choice." [BACK]

27. For research on touch, see Jourard and Robin, "Self-Disclosure and Touching." For the study on physical affection between parents and children, see Barber and Thomas, "Fathers' and Mothers' Supportive Behavior." [BACK]

28. Finkelhor, "Sexual Climate in Families." [BACK]

29. Parke and Sawin, "Children's Privacy." [BACK]

30. Kanin, "Date Rapists," especially p. 227. [BACK]

31. Goodenough, "Interest in Persons." [BACK]

32. Ehrensaft, "Dual Parenting," p. 326. [BACK]

33. Burlingham, "Preoedipal Infant-Father Relationship." [BACK]

34. It is, of course, misleading to apply the terms homosexual and heterosexual to individuals, because it implies that there are two distinct types of people. Alan Bell, one of the authors of the book under discussion, in an earlier article, "Research in Homosexuality," discussed the myriad ways in which homosexuals differ from one another sexually, not to mention nonsexually. More recently Robert Stoller has affirmed this diversity even more strongly to the point of saying that there is no such thing as homosexuality: "There are the homosexualities and they are as varied in etiology, dynamics, and appearance as the heterosexualities." See the chapter "Psychoanalytic 'Research' on Homosexuality" in Observing the Erotic Imagination, especially pp. 171-72. For the purposes of this study, however, the researchers agreed on a procedure based on both feelings and behaviors, which divided the sample into clearly differentiated groups. [BACK]

35. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, p. 190. [BACK]

36. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, pp. 188 and 189. [BACK]

37. M. Johnson, "Heterosexuality, Male Dominance, and Father Image." [BACK]

38. Bene, "Genesis of Male Homosexuality," especially p. 812. Regarding Bene's distinction, although being married is no guarantee that the individual is heterosexual, it is reasonable to assume that he is heterosexual or bisexual. [BACK]

39. Apperson and McAdoo, "Parental Factors in Childhood of Homosexuals"; Stephan, "Parental Relationships and Early Social Experiences"; continue

Saghir and Robins, Male and Female Homosexuality ; and Evans, "Childhood Parental Relationships." [BACK]

40. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, p. 44.

41. Ibid.; see path diagram for white males in appendix. [BACK]

40. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, p. 44.

41. Ibid.; see path diagram for white males in appendix. [BACK]

42. Stoller, Sex and Gender, Vol. 2. [BACK]

43. Kaye et al., "Homosexuality in Women." These researchers found, contrary to their expectations, that the mothers of the lesbians did not differ markedly from their counterparts in the control group. The authors report, however, "When we turn to the fathers . . . we find a significantly contrasting picture, for they seem to be an alien breed in contrast to the control fathers" (p. 629). See also Saghir and Robins, Male and Female Homosexuality . [BACK]

44. Wolff, Love Between Women . Bene, "Genesis of Female Homosexuality." Loney, "Family Dynamics in Homosexual Women"; Thompson et al., "Parent-Child Relationships and Sexual Identity"; and M. Johnson et al., "Women's Perceptions of Parents." [BACK]

45. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference . See path analysis for white females in the Appendix. The data do not show that "inadequate" fathers cause lesbianism but may indicate instead that lesbians view their fathers as inadequate. [BACK]

46. For further discussion of parental identification and girls, see M. Johnson, "Sex Role Learning in Nuclear Family," and A. Heilbrun, Human Sex Role Behavior, pp. 132-66. [BACK]

47. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, pp. 136-37. [BACK]

48. Bene, "Genesis of Female Homosexuality," especially p. 133. Wolff, Love Between Women . [BACK]

49. Conversation with Marilyn Frye, 1985. [BACK]

50. Bell, Weinberg, and Hammersmith, Sexual Preference, p. 183. [BACK]

51. This is the stance taken in Chafetz, et al., Who's Queer? [BACK]

52. Harry, Gay Children Grown Up . [BACK]

53. M. Johnson, "Sex Role Learning in Nuclear Family." [BACK]

54. Winch, "Oedipus Hypothesis." [BACK]

55. Alfred Heilbrun, in Human Sex Role Behavior, reports that "within the nuclear family configuration, a daughter's primary identification with a stereotypically masculine father has been found to correlate positively with adjustment with femininity and curiously with depression in the daughter." Perhaps the depression is a response to being a well-adjusted girl in a male-dominant society. break [BACK]

1. See Mitchell, Psychoanalysis and Feminism, and "On Freud and the Sexes." For a similar version of this section set in a somewhat different context, see M. Johnson, "Reproducing Male Dominance." [BACK]

2. Mitchell, "On Freud and the Sexes," p. 36. [BACK]

3. G. Rubin ("Traffic in Women") provides a more anthropologically sophisticated discussion of "the exchange of women." [BACK]

4. Mitchell, "On Freud and the Sexes," p. 36. [BACK]

5. Stoller, "Freud's Concept of Bisexuality." [BACK]

6. Sheleff, Generations Apart . [BACK]

7. Zilboorg, "Masculine and Feminine," especially p. 288. [BACK]

8. Freud, Civilization and Its Discontents, p. 19. This statement is made in a context that makes one expect him to say "a mother's protection," but he does not. Real life for Freud begins with father. [BACK]

9. Parsons, "Family Structure and the Socialization of the Child" in Parsons and Bales, Family Socialization, pp. 35-131. See also Parsons, "Social Structure and the Development of Personality" in his Social Structure and Personality, pp. 78-111. [BACK]

10. Fischer and Watson, "Explaining the Oedipus Conflict." [BACK]

11. Rush, "Freudian Cover-Up." Masson, Assault on Truth . [BACK]

12. On this see Masson, "Persecution and Expulsion of Jeffrey Masson." [BACK]

13. Bonaparte, Freud, and Kris, eds., Letters of Wilhelm Fliess . [BACK]

14. Russell, Sexual Exploitation, pp. 177-214, especially p. 186. Finkelhor, Sexually Victimized Children, p. 88. [BACK]

15. Russell, Sexual Exploitation, p. 189. [BACK]

16. Finkelhor, Sexually Victimized Children, p. 101. For research on problems with intimacy, see Meiselman, Incest ; Herman, Father-Daughter Incest . For alienation of incest victims from mothers, see Herman, Father-Daughter Incest . [BACK]

17. Armstrong, Kiss Daddy Goodnight . [BACK]

18. Foucault, History of Sexuality . [BACK]

19. Mitchell, Women, The Longest Revolution, pp. 295-313, especially p. 308. [BACK]

20. Herman, Father-Daughter Incest, p. 125. [BACK]

21. Gelinas, "Negative Effects of Incest." [BACK]

22. Adams-Tucker and Adams, "Role of Father," p. 230. [BACK]

23. Gordon and O'Keefe, "Incest as Family Violence," especially pp. 32-33. [BACK]

24. Gelinas, "Negative Effects of Incest." [BACK]

25. Finkelhor, Sexually Victimized Children, pp. 50-51. [BACK]

26. For many of these thoughts on the romance novel, I am indebted continue

to an unpublished paper by Marcia Stille, a graduate student in Interdisciplinary Studies at the University of Oregon. [BACK]

27. A. Heilbrun, Human Sex Role Behavior, pp. 161-62. [BACK]

28. Radway, Reading the Romance, p. 125. Radway interviewed a sample of women readers of romance novels about what they got out of them. [BACK]

29. Rush, "Sexual Abuse of Children," p. 71. [BACK]

30. Benjamin, "End of Internalization," especially note on p. 60. [BACK]

31. Bieber, "Clinical Aspects of Male Homosexuality." [BACK]

32. Freud, "Psychogenesis of Homosexuality in a Woman," pp. 145-46nn. [BACK]

33. For summaries of these studies see M. Johnson, "Heterosexuality, Male Dominance, and Father Image." [BACK]

34. Tripp, Homosexual Matrix . [BACK]

35. Harry, Gay Children Crown Up . [BACK]

36. Freud, "Psychogenesis of Homosexuality in a Woman," p. 135. [BACK]

37. Gayle Rubin quotes these statements in a footnote in "Traffic in Women," p. 202. [BACK]

38. For a good discussion of the controlling function of the deviance label with respect to lesbians, see Zita, "Historical Amnesia and Lesbian Continuum." Zita's comment is one among several excellent commentaries on Adrienne Rich's ideas concerning a lesbian continuum contained in Signs 7 (1981). See Ferguson, Zita, and Addelson, "Compulsory Heterosexuality and Lesbian Existence." [BACK]

39. Snitow, Stansell, and Thompson, eds., Powers of Desire, p. 34. [BACK]

1. Mitchell, Psychoanalysis and Feminism ; G. Rubin, "Traffic in Women." Rubin repudiates her position explicitly in "Thinking Sex," p. 307. Mitchell repudiates her position indirectly in the last essay in her Women, The Longest Revolution, p. 307. [BACK]

2. The material in the remainder of this section (pp. 187-95) draws from my article "Reproducing Male Dominance." [BACK]

3. For a good statement and partial critique of Freud's concept of bisexuality, see Stoller, "Freud's Concept of Bisexuality." [BACK]

4. For several passages referring to parental identification, see Burlingham, "Preoedipal Infant-Father Relationship," especially pp. 26-27. [BACK]

5. Quoted in Burlingham, "Preoedipal Infant-Father Relationship," p. 27. [BACK]

6. For example, in "Female Sexuality" (p. 53), Freud says, "In this the complete identity of the pre-Oedipus phase in boys and girls is recog- soft

nized, and the girl's sexual (phallic) activity towards her mother is affirmed and substantiated by observations." [BACK]

7. Freud, "Femininity," p. 87. [BACK]

8. Freud, "Female Sexuality," p. 51. [BACK]

9. Quoted by Mitchell from Freud's "Femininity" in her Psychoanalysis and Feminism, p. 117n. [BACK]

10. Rossi cites this in "Biosocial Perspective on Parenting," especially p. 17. [BACK]

11. Schafer, "Freud's Psychology of Women." [BACK]

12. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering, p. 165 [BACK]

13. Mitchell, Psychoanalysis and Feminism, p. 128. [BACK]

14. Horney, "Flight from Womanhood." [BACK]

15. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering, pp. 115-17. [BACK]

16. Quoted by Burlingham, "Preoedipal Infant-Father Relationship," p. 27. [BACK]

17. Mitchell, Psychoanalysis and Feminism, p. 56. [BACK]

18. See Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering . She says, for example, "A second assumpton is that sexual orientation and mode define gender. A little girl is a little man or boy because she loves a woman, and her sexuality is active and clitoral. 'Changing sex,' as Freud puts it means giving up her clitoris and her activity" (p. 147). And again in parentheses she says, "for psychoanalysts, femininity means genital heterosexuality" (p. 111). [BACK]

19. G. Rubin, "Traffic in Women," p. 199. [BACK]

20. Mitchell, Women, The Longest Revolution, p. 308. [BACK]

21. G. Rubin, "Thinking Sex," p. 307. [BACK]

22. Money and Ehrhardt, Man and Woman . [BACK]

23. See chapter 7, "Minimizing Versus Maximizing Sex Differences," in Money, Love and Love Sickness . For Money, gender identity and gender role are two sides of the same coin, which he refers to as Gender-Identity/Role or G-I/R. In his terms, G-I/R definitely includes heterosexuality, and he speaks against those feminists who assume that gender identity is nothing but a matter of declaring oneself male or female (pp. 87-88). He excludes passivity or submission from the role, however. He has little conception of the rootedness of male dominance in social structure and simply pronounces it "obsolete." [BACK]

24. Stoller, "Freud's Concept of Bisexuality," pp. 351-53. [BACK]

25. Stoller, "Femininity," p. 132. [BACK]

26. J. Ross, "Towards Fatherhood." [BACK]

27. Chodorow, Reproduction of Mothering, p. 113. [BACK]

28. Matthews, "Sex-Role Perception." [BACK]

29. This point is similar to that made by Abelin, who speaks of a little girl enacting a maternal generational identity while the boy emulates a continue

male gender identity. Abelin tends to make the usual assumption, however, that gender means sexual, since he refers to the girl's generational identity as a "madonna asexual complex." (E. Abelin, Panel contribution, "The Role of the Father in the Preoedipal Years," Proceedings of the Sixty-sixth Annual Meeting of the American Psychoanalytical Association, April 1977, Quebec. See also J. Ross, "Fathering." [BACK]

30. Ullian, "'Why Girls Are Good.'" [BACK]

31. Unger, Female and Male, pp. 213-14. [BACK]

32. Ullian, "'Why Girls Are Good,'" p. 250. [BACK]

33. Kohlberg, "Children's Sex Role Concepts." See also Kohlberg and Zigler, "Impact of Cognitive Maturity." [BACK]

34. Ullian, "Regression in Service of Male Ego." [BACK]

35. Wickert, "Freud's Heritage." [BACK]

36. Money, "Conceptual Neutering of Gender," p. 282.

37. Ibid. [BACK]

36. Money, "Conceptual Neutering of Gender," p. 282.

37. Ibid. [BACK]

38. When speaking of roles, a learned role was a gender role. Sex role then would refer to role in sexual intercourse. (See Tresemer, "Assumptions Made About Gender Roles.") This usage is confusing since surely learning is also involved in intercourse. [BACK]

39. Kessler and McKenna, Gender . [BACK]

40. MacKinnon, "An Agenda for Theory." [BACK]

41. MacKinnon, "Toward Feminist Jurisprudence," especially p. 635. [BACK]

42. MacKinnon, "An Agenda for Theory," p. 533. [BACK]

43. G. Rubin, "Thinking Sex," p. 307. [BACK]

44. Rubin sees MacKinnon as wanting "to subsume sexuality under feminist thought" and seems to think that MacKinnon is making a definitional fusion between gender and sex. My reading of MacKinnon indicates that this is not the case. [BACK]

45. For more discussion of the politics of AIDS, see Fitzgerald, Cities on a Hill. [BACK]

46. Money, "Conceptual Neutering of Gender." [BACK]

47. Degler, "Women in Making of Demographic Transition" in his At Odds . [BACK]

48. See Kinsey et al., Sexual Behavior in Human Female, and Masters and Johnson, Human Sexual Response . [BACK]

49. See especially Koedt, "Myth of Vaginal Orgasm." [BACK]

50. Person, "Sexuality as Mainstay of Identity." [BACK]

51. The above comments were stimulated by and built on Spender, "The Politics of Naming," especially p. 177. [BACK]

52. Goldman, "Prostitution." [BACK]

53. Schulz, "Rape Is Four-Letter Word." See also discussion in Spender, "The Politics of Naming," especially pp. 179-80. [BACK]

54. M. Morgan, Total Woman, especially pp. 106-7 and back cover. break [BACK]

55. Foucault, History of Sexuality . [BACK]

56. Snitow, Stansell, and Thompson, eds., Powers of Desire, especially pp. 30-33. [BACK]

57. For example, see Carroll, Volk, and Hyde, "Motives for Sexual Intercourse." [BACK]

58. L. Rubin, Intimate Strangers, p. 104. [BACK]

59. Blumstein and Schwartz, American Couples . [BACK]

60. Symons, Evolution of Human Sexuality, pp. 170-184, especially p. 179. [BACK]

61. Blumstein and Schwartz, American Couples, p. 205. [BACK]

62. For the connection of sex and aggression, see Stoller, Sexual Excitement . For the connection with degrading the object, see Freud, "Degradation in Erotic Life." [BACK]

63. Masters and Johnson, Human Sexual Response, and Homosexuality in Perspective . [BACK]

64. Spender, "The Politics of Naming," pp. 172ff. [BACK]

65. Contratto, "Maternal Sexuality." [BACK]

66. Friedrich, Meaning of Aphrodite, p. 181. [BACK]

67. For a more psychoanalytic version of this theory, see Slater, Glory of Hera . [BACK]

68. Benjamin, "Desire of One's Own." [BACK]

69. Frye, "Harm's Way," in Politics of Reality . [BACK]

1. Whyte, Status of Women, see especially the concluding chapter. Whyte is very leery of making cross-cultural generalizations concerning the status of women because so many different variables are involved, but he does tend to argue that the agrarian societies were generally more oppressive than both simpler and more complex modern societies. [BACK]

2. Lévi-Strauss, Elementary Structures of Kinship, pp. 116-18. For a classic discussion of the characteristics of matrilineal societies, see Schneider, "Matrilineal Descent Groups." [BACK]

3. Collins, "Conflict Theory of Sexual Stratification." G. Johnson and Hendrix, "Test of Collins's Theory." [BACK]

4. Reiss, "Sociological Journey into Sexuality," especially p. 236. See also Journey into Sexuality . [BACK]

5. Witherspoon, Navajo Kinship and Marriage . [BACK]

6. I am indebted to Estep, "Feminist Consciousness and Navajo World View," for this general picture. [BACK]

7. Schlegel, "Male and Female in Hopi Thought." [BACK]

8. Weiner, "Trobriand Descent." break [BACK]

9. Coltrane, "Father-Child Relationship." [BACK]

10. Quoted in Tanner, "Matrifocality," p. 156. [BACK]

11. Toni Morrison is quoted in Hooks, Feminist Theory, p. 50. [BACK]

12. African kinship provides a sharp contrast to the husband/father-headed family with which we are familiar. In many African societies, bridewealth circulates around the society and represents the reciprocal obligations of one corporate kin group to another. Women work for their husbands but do not own the products of this work as a family member; their ties are to their own kin group. Women engage in joint work activities with other women, and a woman can pass on property to her children separately from her husband. In this system the idea of father as we know it does not exist. Although the degree of gender equality existing in African societies is complex and controversial, women are definitely not juvenilized as they are under patriarchal systems. See especially Sacks, Sisters and Wives . [BACK]

13. D. Lewis, "The Black Family," p. 229 (quoted). [BACK]

14. Hartmann, "Marxism and Feminism," p. 18. [BACK]

15. Ortner, "Virgin and State," especially p. 29. [BACK]

16. Bakan, They Took Themselves Wives, especially p. 14. [BACK]

17. See especially Hamilton, Liberation of Women . [BACK]

18. Bernard, Future of Marriage, p. 335. [BACK]

19. Quoted in Demos, "Changing Faces of Fatherhood," especially p. 432. [BACK]

20. Degler, At Odds, p. 74. [BACK]

21. Ryan, Womanhood in America, p. 218. [BACK]

22. Smith-Rosenberg, "New Woman as Androgyne," in Disorderly Conduct, especially pp. 253 and 256. [BACK]

23. It is interesting that Betty Friedan in the early days of renewed feminism referred to the "lavender menace" as a threat to the Women's Movement. Fortunately, Friedan later changed her position and "accepted" diversity within the movement. [BACK]

24. Lundberg and Farnham, Modern Woman, p. 167. [BACK]

25. Laslett, "Family Membership." [BACK]

26. Parsons, "Age and Sex in the Social Structure of the United States," in his Essays in Sociological Theory, pp. 89-103, especially p. 98. [BACK]

27. Oppenheimer, "Women's Economic Role in Family," challenges this view with the argument that strain might not arise in a two-career family if there was no norm against wives' working. [BACK]

28. Ryan, Womanhood in America, p. 255. [BACK]

29. Heer and Grossbard-Shectman, "Female Marriage Squeeze." See also Guttentag and Secord, Too Many Women? break [BACK]

30. Surveys conducted in 1982 and 1987 on random samples of all non-foreign University of Oregon undergraduates twenty-three years old and under show that in both years the males were more likely than the females to have fathers with only a high school education or less. (Findings of the Sociology Department's graduate seminar in survey methods, taught by Patricia Gwartney-Gibbs.) See also B. Johnson, "Sex Differences in College Aspirations." [BACK]

31. Flacks, Youth and Social Change, p. 32. [BACK]

32. Gordon, "Feminism, Reproduction, and the Family," p. 41. [BACK]

33. Pleck continues to be optimistic. He believes we are seeing an increase in fathers' time spent in the family, but only because he takes decreasing family size into account. Generally, however, even Pleck would have to agree that what little convergence there is in men's and women's family time is due far more to working women's decrease in time spent in the home than to men's increase in time spent working in the home. See his Working Wives/Working Husbands. A more recent study (Barnett and Baruch, "Fathers' Participation in Family Work") finds that maternal employment status does not directly predict father involvement but rather creates the conditions under which other variables emerge as significant predictors within the employed and unemployed groups. [BACK]

34. Cherlin, Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage, pp. 49-50 and 54-55. [BACK]

35. Parsons, "Age and Sex," p. 94, n. 4. [BACK]

36. Wallerstein and Kelly, Surviving the Breakup. See also Kelly, "Divorce: The Adult Perspective." [BACK]

37. It is true that there has been an increase in men who file for divorce since no-fault divorce laws were put into effect, but who files for divorce is a separate issue from who found the marriage the most unsatisfactory. See Dixon and Weitzman, "When Husbands File for Divorce." [BACK]

38. Kitson and Sussman, "Marital Complaints," p. 93. This was the third most common response for men and the twenty-ninth most common for women. [BACK]

39. See also Levinger, "Sources of Marital Dissatisfaction." [BACK]

1. Illich's book, Gender, published in 1982, is devoted to making this point. Illich argues, in what appears to me to be an unnecessarily cryptic way, that the market standard is a male standard and that therefore women in the market are paid less than men. He also recognizes that under "economistic" or utilitarian cost-benefit assumptions, it is hard to measure women's unpaid nonmarket work, that is, what women do—for children, for men, in the home and in the community. I argue that it is the work of women as wives that Illich is trying to conceptualize. This work is broader continue

than housework but includes it; it also includes women's mothering, but mothering that is strictly privatized and subordinated to the heterosexual couple. Wives' work, since it is not directly marketable in a market economy, gets defined as worthless. [BACK]

2. Delphy, Close to Home, pp. 94-95. Joan Acker, in an influential early article ("Women and Stratification"), stressed that hierarchies based on gender create different conditions for women and men within the same family. Although this insight was an important first step in making women visible in stratification studies, it is also important to recognize that gender hierarchy is itself related to the extent to which married women's life chances depend on those of their husbands. [BACK]

3. Delphy, 1984, Close to Home, p. 96. [BACK]

4. See especially Coser and Rokoff, "Women in the Occupational World." [BACK]

5. Blood and Wolfe, Husbands and Wives. [BACK]

6. Gillespie, "Who Has the Power?" [BACK]

7. Weitzman, Divorce Revolution, pp. 337-43. Other studies made on larger populations representing the nation as a whole come up with less dramatic percentages but they are still in the same direction: income up for men, down for women upon divorce. See especially Duncan and Hoffman, "Economic Consequences of Marital Dissolution." Duncan and Hoffman's main point is that most women do not remain in poverty because they remarry. Thus the solution to poverty for women is to again become dependent on a husbands income! [BACK]

8. Debate between Phyllis Schlafly and Sara Weddington, February 27, 1986, University of Oregon. [BACK]

9. Wickert, "Freud's Heritage." [BACK]

10. Doi, The Anatomy of Dependence. [BACK]

11. Altman, Homosexualization of America. [BACK]

12. See Whitehead's discussion of the berdache in American Indian societies ("Bow and Burden Strap," p. 95). Whereas earlier interpreters of this status in which a man adopted a woman's activities focused on its "homosexual" implications, Whitehead maintains that homosexuality was "never mentioned as one of the indicators of the budding berdache." The berdache involved taking on female occupation and dress, with sexual orientation playing only a minor role. [BACK]

13. Brownmiller, Femininity. [BACK]

14. Roy, "Concepts of 'Femininity' and 'Liberation,'" p. 221. [BACK]

15. Stevens, "Women's Liberation Movement in Latin America," p. 75. [BACK]

16. D. Lewis, "Black Family." [BACK]

17. For a good summary of trends with respect to women and the family, see Cherlin, "Women and the Family." [BACK]

18. Holter, ed., Patriarchy in Welfare Society. break [BACK]

19. Swidler, "Love and Adulthood in American Culture." See also Bellah et al., Habits of the Heart, chapter 4. [BACK]

20. The pollster Daniel Yankelovich reports that in 1970 and again in 1980, 96 percent of all Americans "declared themselves dedicated to the ideal of two people sharing a life and home together" ( New Rules, p. 249). The couple, presumably any two people—not men's groups, not women's groups, not kin groups nor even friends—is the central locus of loyalty and commitment among adult citizens in the United States. [BACK]

21. Waite, Goldscheider, and Witsberger, "Nonfamily Living." See also Marini, "Age and Sequencing Norms." [BACK]

22. Roebuck, "Grandma as Revolutionary." [BACK]

23. Gordon and O'Keefe, "Incest as Family Violence," report from a study of fifty incest cases in Boston from 1880 to 1960 that, although they could not measure the father's participation in child-rearing directly, they did find that the presence of the father in the household (which at least made it possible for him to have child care responsibilities) was more likely to be associated with nonsexual abuse than with incest. "Ninety-five percent of male nonsexual child-abuse assailants lived in the same household as their children, as compared with 68% of incest assailants. This is the more striking considering that sharing a house often provided more opportunity for an illicit sexual relationship" (p. 30). This at least suggests that overt incest is not necessarily encouraged in males by their living in the same household, at least if the mother is present. H. Parker and S. Parker ("Father-Daughter Sexual Abuse," especially p. 545) have reported research comparing a sample of incestuous fathers with agematched nonincestuous fathers in penal and psychiatric facilities. The authors found that the abusing fathers were much less likely to have lived in the home during the first three years of the child's life. Their major conclusions were that the combination of a father's own early parental-attachment deficits and his low level of involvement in the socialization of his daughter increased considerably the probability of abuse. [BACK]

24. On incest's being more common among stepfathers than among fathers, see Finkelhor, Child Sexual Abuse, p. 25. [BACK]

25. See C. Lewis, Becoming a Father, for an explicit presentation of the following "beliefs" about fathers: "that fathers have only recently been discovered by family researchers, . . . that in previous generations fathers were not involved in childrearing, . . . and that recently men have started to become highly involved in and committed to child care." [BACK]

26. Kamerman, "Child Care Services."

27. Ibid. [BACK]

26. Kamerman, "Child Care Services."

27. Ibid. [BACK]

28. Hewlett, A Lesser Life. [BACK]

29. Goode, "Why Men Resist," p. 139. break [BACK]

30. For clarification of this issue, see Mansbridge, "ERA and Gender Gap." [BACK]

31. Gill, "Attitudes Toward Equal Rights Amendment." [BACK]

32. Poole and Zeigler, Women, Public Opinion, and Politics, p. 6. [BACK]

33. Shapiro and Mahajan, "Gender Differences in Policy Preferences." break [BACK]